A Conversation with OCD and Me

Finally, a good night’s sleep! I feel so rested and peaceful! Alright, what to do today?

Morning! Remember me? We were ruminating on that thing for the last few days, but then I got quiet. 

Oh God, not you again.  

So, how about... THIS?!

Okay, it's fine. Just breathe, in for four counts, hold for seven and out for eight — I need to calm down. I know what’s happening. These are just thoughts. They aren’t real. 

What about the thing I just said? 

Come on. I know this pattern.

Okay, maybe you didn’t hear me, so I’ll say it louder.

Is it true? Is it? Maybe this is different from my obsessive thoughts. Maybe this one is actually true...

Let’s keep going with this.

I really hope I don’t go down a rabbit hole trying to figure this out.

Nah, let’s go down the rabbit hole. 

Wait, what time is it? How have I been stuck here for 45 minutes? I haven’t even brushed my teeth yet.

You lose your appetite and don’t have energy for anything when you feel this way. That works in my favor. Let’s keep going.

Ah, I can’t be bothered by this. Or anything. My whole day is ruined already. I’m just going to stay in bed.

YES! Great idea. 

Right. But logically and morally, this doesn’t seem like something that could be true.

But what if it is true?

No, come on! That’s not how I see myself.

You wouldn’t still be thinking about this if it weren’t.

Now I’m really stressed. Wait, no. I’m doubting myself... This is just my OCD!

. . .

Phew! See, I knew it wasn’t real. It's just my brain obsessing. Right, time to get up and start my day.

But what if this isn’t OCD? What if… it’s you?

ARRRGGGHHH!

About the Author

Georgia is a 21-year-old professional dancer from London who is navigating adulthood with OCD. She hopes to spread awareness through her writing and art. You can find her on Instagram @Georgia_E23.